A Reflection On Pride - Brick by Brick
Let’s Start Forging an Affirming Culture One Brick at a Time
A Reflection On Pride Month - Brick by Brick
Let’s Start Forging an Affirming Culture One Brick at a Time
Content Warning: Please note that this piece makes reference to suicide trends and references loss of life.
Trevor Project TrevorLifeline 1-866-488-7386
Quick Summary
The road to 2SLGBTQIA+ community safety-by-right will be paved brick by brick.
We all have a brick to forge for that road.
Whether I attended a Pride celebration, rally, or protest in June–the foundation of community remained.
Without a community, a road cannot be built.
For Pride Month, I wanted to utilize my time in a public space at work with hundreds of people to let individuals know that I was a safe person.
I wore a pride scrunchie and a heart-shaped pride progress flag sticker every day that I worked.
It’s okay to be scared right now. I’m scared right now. Be unapologetic about your fear.
We should prioritize joy and happiness when it’s possible. After all, joy is an act of resistance.
It brought me so much joy seeing support for 2SLGBTQIA+ youth at Pride.
I have always found that at Pride, small acts of kindness and consideration tend to pop up significantly more than in other settings.
It’s okay to feel grief. You’re not alone in the collective mourning.
During a rally, a 2SLGBTQIA+ rights activist championed visibility as something that would save lives.
She likened the act of visibility to a burning light, encouraging rally attendees to not suppress their fire (authentic self) because you never know who else you are keeping warm with your flame.
To individuals feeling hopeless: promise me and yourself that you will KEEP BREATHING. Your place here is valid, and this pocket of history will pass.
Queer and trans people of all ages need their neighbors, friends, family, (their community) to come together to stand up for them.
Creating an affirming culture won’t happen overnight.
Mobilize funding and refuse erasure.
Challenge homophobia and transphobia at school board meetings, state legislatures, and town halls.
Back candidates who protect 2SLGBTQIA+ rights.
Listen to the queer and trans community, amplify their voices, and support their causes.
Hope is not lost. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us.
Take comfort in global acts of resistance right now
A big part of my brick is instilling values of compassion, empathy, and impact-oriented actions in my son with direct action.
Your brick must have an intersectional approach.
Ask yourself: What are the interconnected systems of harm? Who are they harming? What do you do to challange them?
We have to priortize empathy over punishment and profit.
Again, keep breathing. Keep taking up space. Keep forging your brick.
Safety Infrastructure Begins With Community
Make no mistake: the road to 2SLGBTQIA+ community safety-by-right will be paved brick by brick; the question is, what does your brick in it look like?
Part of my brick is this piece written with the intent to help you forge yours.
I knew I wanted to write about the importance of Pride, especially during this pocket of history, and initially thought I’d publish it in early June. It wasn’t until today that I could fully organize my thoughts.
Throughout June, I took note of what the community was facing and adjusted my work accordingly.
What began as a how-to piece for others, in tandem, became a piece sharing my own lived experience as a queer autistic woman living in the United States in 2025.
Last month, I was fortunate enough to attend multiple events–whether it was a Pride celebration, rally, or protest–the foundation of community remained.
Without a community, a road cannot be built.
So I invite you to explore what molding, firing, and laying your brick looks like while pressing you to be mindful that your brick ensures that the road can be used by all.
TAKE UP SPACE!
I was scheduled to work the first day of June and wanted to utilize my time in a public space with hundreds of people to let individuals know that I was a safe person. I wore a pride scrunchie and a heart-shaped pride progress flag sticker every day that I worked in June, occasionally adding a pride bow to my ensemble.
Never once was my attire met with anything negative, and on multiple occasions, fellow members of the queer community were delighted to see it, and so were allies.
I lost count of the number of people who extended acknowledgement of my look, but one woman particularly stuck out to me. Her seemingly simple comment of having the same design as my sticker on her car for her son was weighted with fear and comfort.
During our encounter, it was clear that both of us are uneasy right now, but the public support and visibility of one another comforted both of us.
Be Unapologetic for Your Fear
It’s okay to be scared right now. I’m scared right now.
I watched the news about Pride events happening across the country vigilantly. My local Pride event wasn’t until the second weekend of June and although I had every intention of going, I couldn’t help but wonder if a news pattern may convince me otherwise.
As mid-June neared, I continued to be mindful about how to approach my participation in Pride with a degree of uncertainty.
I wondered what time of day I should arrive at Pride and how long I should stay.
I wondered how I should get to Pride. Should I spring for a Lyft and hope the driver isn’t hateful? Or take a public bus for a fraction of the cost and hope my openly queer attire isn’t met with hostility, on the way to the bus stop or even on the bus?
It’s okay to not always know what to do. We can be unapologetic about indecision during unpredictable times, too. However, we should prioritize joy and happiness when it’s possible. After all, joy is an act of resistance.
Be Unapologetic for Your Joy
Eventually, I opted to take the bus and was relieved when I boarded to see another individual who was also clearly on their way to Pride.
After reaching my destination, I walked a few blocks to find a spot to watch the pride parade beneath a tree. Even though I didn’t have any music playing, I kept my earbuds in to muffle the surrounding sounds from the crowds since such noise tends to overwhelm me.
A fellow anticipating parade viewer with his young son sat down with a fair gap between us.
After some time, he quietly approached me to offer me a small pride flag. I'm not sure if my body language expressed the slight dysregulation and anxiety I was having in the moment, or simply having my earbuds in gave him the impression that approaching with a low volume was necessary. Either way, his thoughtful consideration was deeply appreciated.
I have always found that at Pride, small acts of kindness and consideration tend to pop up significantly more than in other settings.
The gap between us was soon filled by a small family: the mom in a Free Mom Hugs t-shirt, a dad in a Proud Dad to My Non-Binary Child t-shirt, the young daughter in rainbow colors, all clearly supporting the older child.
It brought me so much joy seeing support for 2SLGBTQIA+ youth.
Moments later the parade started and hundreds of individuals marched in the name of queer and trans people’s right to exist.
Collective elation overwhelmed the block I was on, and fear was absent from everyone’s mind. I waved my new pride flag with unapologetic joy.
I spent the next few hours exploring booths from local organizations, businesses, and churches in support of the 2SLGBTQIA+ community before attending a rally where a local queer and trans rights activist took the stage to share her heartbreaking story.
Be Unapologetic for Your Grief
She began by explaining that her child (a member of the 2SLGBTQIA+ community) was no longer with us because they had taken their own life. She shared she was grieving the loss of her child and understood that the community was grieving and afraid, especially since last November.
Grief is common in the queer and trans community. Hardly any of us ever get to be fully authentic so we grieve lost time. We grieve a lack of simplicity in existence, as so much effort is exhausted in hyper vigilance of assessing situations and calculating safety levels depending on the company around us. We grieve for those who are unable to come out, and we grieve the losses in our community with so many of our lives cut short.
It’s okay to feel grief. You’re not alone in the collective mourning.
The speaker went on to thank the crowd (the queer and trans community and the allies supporting them) for having the courage to show up to Pride when people told them not to go and she championed visibility as something that would save lives.
She likened the act of visibility to a burning light, telling the rally attendees that people may tell you to avoid showing your fire (authentic self) but you never know who else you are keeping warm with your flame.
These words were echoed by other speakers at the rally with continued calls to action for taking up space and direct action in the community, confirmation that little acts like visible pride stickers make a difference. Taking up space makes a difference.
While it may not always be validated, even those who remain in the closet are taking up space. I see you. I’m proud of you. I promise a day will come where you’ll be out.
Keep Breathing
Since the tone in my piece is a bit heavy at this point, I want to take a moment to speak directly to individuals feeling hopeless: promise me and yourself that you will KEEP BREATHING. Your place here is valid and this pocket of history will pass; the future world will be better than you could have ever imagined with you in it.
If you ever think otherwise, don’t hesitate to reach out for help. Trevor Project TrevorLifeline 1-866-488-7386
To queer/trans-adjacent individuals: be aware of what your loved ones are facing.
39% of 2SLGBTQIA+ youth seriously considered suicide in the past year.
46% of transgender and nonbinary young people considered suicide in the past year.
12% of 2SLGBTQIA+ young people attempted suicide in the past year.
90% of 2SLGBTQIA+ young people said their well-being was negatively impacted due to recent politics.
Queer and trans people of all ages need their neighbors, friends, family, (their community) to come together to stand up for them. Creating an affirming culture won’t happen overnight.
Direct Action
Mobilize funding. This year, corporate sponsors dropped local pride events throughout the country but through grassroots and collective action, the events prevailed. Just one example, Twin Cities Pride in Minnesota faced a staggering loss of $700,000 that they more than made up for when support from foundations, small businesses, and individual donations amounted to nearly $900,000.
Apply this community engagement in other scenarios for the betterment of the 2SLGBTQIA+ community.
Refuse erasure. There were no shortages of legislative attempts to erase the 2SLGBTQIA+ community with trans youth taking the biggest hits in the United States this June, but no court can remove the existence of queer and trans people.
The government has made it harder for queer and trans kids to have representation in public schools so give 2SLGBTQIA+ youth another outlet. Donate affirming books to free libraries.
Show up to school board meetings, state legislatures, and town halls to challenge homophobia and transphobia. Back candidates who protect 2SLGBTQIA+ rights. Hateful individuals have electorally infiltrated our highest levels of government, elect those who stand with the queer and trans community into those spaces.
Listen to the community, amplify their voices, and support their causes.
Despite the devastating setbacks, hope is not lost. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us.
That’s right, I just quoted Gandalf because I’m a huge nerd and Lord of the Rings brings me joy, and again, joy is an act of resistance.
Take comfort in global acts of resistance right now. Despite Hungary's parliament passing a law banning pride events, the mayor of its capital circumvented the ban and took back Budapest for the queer and trans community to take up space, and the likes of hundreds of thousands of individuals from 30 countries took up that space.
As I watched the footage of this pride event, I knew I wanted to do more than just write this piece on the final weekend of June. I wanted to take up space and I invited my teenage son to join me. Without hesitation, he attended his first pride event to stand in solidarity with his peers in the 2SLGBTQIA+ community.
In addition to frequenting local small businesses and vendors in the area of a queer and trans youth celebration, we donated to a free pantry and a tiny free library attached to the local 2SLGBTQIA+ youth organization. As it turns out, a big part of my brick is instilling values of compassion, empathy, and impact-oriented actions in my son.
I encourage anyone with kids (even ones who are young adults) to inspire them to do what leads to a more affirming culture.
Intersectional Advocacy
Before I wrap this up, I want to remind everyone that your brick must have an intersectional approach.
Ask yourself: What are the interconnected systems of harm? Who are they harming? What do you do to challenge them?
Don’t forget to think globally.
The same carceral-capitalist structures that drive the harm to Palestinians (who are facing genocide) and immigrants and refugees in the United States (who are subjected to kidnappings bearing resemblance to Nazi Germany) are the same structures harming Black, Brown, Indigenous, disabled, impoverished, unhoused, queer, and trans people throughout the world.
Collectively, we can pave a path where this doesn’t have to be the case. We just have to prioritize empathy over punishment and profit.
Pride Month brought a significant amount to process (honestly, the whole year of 2025 has brought an almost incomprehensible amount). After days of writing, I’m glad I was finally able to share my thoughts. Much to my surprise, this piece turned out more personal than I originally assumed it would be, and I thank you for listening to what I had to share.
Keep breathing.
Keep taking up space.
Keep forging your brick.
References
2024 National Survey on LGBTQ+ Youth Mental Health